7 ways to not feel so overwhelmed all the time

7 ways to not feel so overwhelmed all the time7 ways to not feel so overwhelmed all the timeFeeling overwhelmed? Are you constantly running from thing to thing but never getting it all done?When researchers survey people, they say theyre too busy - about everything.Too busy to make friends, date, sleep, have sex, to go on vacation or to even have lunch.Via Overwhelmed Work, Love, and Play When No One Has the TimeIn surveys, people say theyre too busy to make friends outside the amtsstube, too busy to date, too busy to sleep, and too busy to have sex. Eight in ten Britons report being too busy to eat dessert, even though four in ten say dessert is better than sex. Were in such a rush that the typical sound bite for a presidential candidate has been compressed from forty seconds in 1968 to 7.3 seconds in 2000. Remember those unused vacation days? People say theyre too busy to take a vacation and too busy for a lunch break.The average high school kid today experiences the same level of anxiety as the average psychiatric patient of the 1950s.And being this busy isnt healthy - in fact, neuroscientists have found it shrinks your brain.ViaOverwhelmed Work, Love, and Play When No One Has the Timethe prefrontal cortex. It is the key to human intelligence. In its size and complexity, it is, in short, what distinguishes humans from animals and makes us who we are. And, Ansell says, what she and other neuroscientists are finding is that when a human feels pressed for time, rushed and caught up in the overwhelm, that yellow blob does something alarming It shrinks.How did we get here? How did this happen?I have an answer but its going to surprise you and might even make you angryIts all an illusion. You have mora free time than you ever did.Do I sound insane? Keep reading.Youre not busy. You just feelbusy.John Robinson is the leading sociologist who studies time use. His colleagues call him Father Time.Looking at time diary studies he shows that globally we all have more l eisure time than ever.ViaOverwhelmed Work, Love, and Play When No One Has the TimeHe insists that although most Americans feel theyre working harder than ever, they arent. The time diaries he studies show that average hours on the job, not only in the United States but also around the globe, have actually been holding steady or going down in the last forty years. Everybody, he says, has more time for leisure.So why do we feel like were overwhelmed even though were not? Partly, its because our time is so fragmented.Switching between checking email, making dinner, watching TV and finishing that report is more mentally draining than doing one at a time.ViaOverwhelmed Work, Love, and Play When No One Has the TimeIts role overload, she explains. Its the constant switching from one role to the next that creates that feeling of time pressure. When all youre expected to do is work all day, you work all day in one long stretch, she says. But the days of the mothers she studied were full of s tarts and stops, which makes time feel more collapsed.Multitasking is killing us.And the best part?Multitasking doesnt even work. It makes us less efficient even though we feel were getting more done.In fact, it makes you dumber - effectively stupider than being drunk or stoned.ViaOverwhelmed Work, Love, and Play When No One Has the TimeNo two tasks done simultaneously, studies have shown, can be done with 100 percent of ones ability. Driving while talking on the cell phone slows reaction times and awareness to the same degree that driving over the legal alcohol limit does. And the distractions from too many things going on at once hamper the brains spam filter and the ability to distinguish between relevant and irrelevant information. Or, as one British study found, multitasking makes you stupid- dumber than getting stoned.Ed Hallowell, former professor at Harvard Medical School and bestselling author of Driven to Distraction,says we have culturally generated ADD.Via CrazyBusy Ov erstretched, Overbooked, and About to Snap Strategies for umgang Your Fast- Paced LifeHaving treated ADD since 1981, I began to see an upsurge in the mid-1990s in the number of people who complained of being chronically inattentive, disorganized, and overbooked. Many came to me wondering if they had ADD. While some did, most did not. Instead, they had what I called a severe case of modern life.Why do we do this to ourselves? In recent years being busy has become a status symbol.When you ask anyone what theyve been up to, whats always the first word? Busy.ViaOverwhelmed Work, Love, and Play When No One Has the TimePsychologists write of treating burned-out clients who cant shake the notion that the busier you are, the more you are thought of as competent, smart, successful, admired, and even envied.So what can we do about it? Here are seven things experts recommend1. Write it all downWhats the first step toward killing that overwhelmed feeling?Do a brain dump and write everything dow n thats on your mind. Writing reduces worry and organizes your thoughts.ViaOverwhelmed Work, Love, and Play When No One Has the TimeRight now, you need to free up all this energy thats being consumed by worry. She told me to take out a piece of paper, set a timer for five minutes, and write furiously about absolutely everything that was bugging meIf your to-do list lives on paper, your brain doesnt have to expend energy to keep remembering it, Monaghan said.More on the power of a notebook here.2. Prioritize or dieRepeat after meyou cannot get it all done. And some things are more important than others.So you need to prioritize or you will have a clean garage but get fired from your job.Decide what is important and do that first. Otherwise you may never get towhat really matters.ViaCrazyBusy Overstretched, Overbooked, and About to Snap Strategies for Handling Your Fast- Paced LifeAt the heart of making the most of life today is the ability to treasure and protect your connections to what you care most about people, places, activities, pets, a spiritual connection, a piece of music, even objects that are dear to you. But you must not have too many connections or none will flourish. Pick the ones that matter most to you and nourish them religiously make that your top priority in life, and you cant go wrong.More on the power of work/life balance here.3. Make things automaticThings that are habitual dont tax yourwillpower. The more activities you make into habits, the less overwhelmed they will make you feel.Build routines and habits so that youre not deciding, youre just doing.The secret to getting more done is tomake things automatic.Decisons exhaust youThe counterintuitive secret to getting things done is to make them more automatic, so they require less energy.More on how to build great habits here.4. Work like an athleteWe were not designed to go 24/7. We were designed to sprint, rest, sprint - just like an athlete.You sleep in cycles and your mind naturally works in cycles. Alternate hard work with breaks to be at your best.ViaOverwhelmed Work, Love, and Play When No One Has the TimeWe ignore the signs of fatigue, boredom, and distraction and just power through. But were hardly doing our best work. Weve lost touch with the value of rest, renewal, recovery, quiet time, and downtime, Schwartz told me. Its hardly a wonder, then, with the pressure of long hours, putting in face time, and the constant interruptions of the modern workplace, less than 10 percent of workers say they do their best thinking at work.More on working like an athlete here.5. Switch to singletaskingForget multitasking. Thats what causes the feelings of burnout and its not effective.Discover what your peak hours are and protect them.Focus on the most important thing of the day. No interruptions, email or calls.ViaOverwhelmed Work, Love, and Play When No One Has the TimeTerry Monaghan sought to train me to work in pulses. The idea was to chunk my time to minimize the c onstant multitasking, role switching, and toggling back and forth between work and home stuff like a brainless flea on a hot stove. The goal was to create periods of uninterrupted time to concentrate on work- the kind of time I usually found in the middle of the night- during the day.More on how to use your best hours here.6. Live in OHIONot the state. Its an acronym Only Handle It Once.That email youve opened sixty times today, unsure of what to do with it? Stop it.Make a decision. Reply, trash it or set a time to properly deal with it.Revisiting unimportant things over and over is a huge time and energy thief.ViaCrazyBusy Overstretched, Overbooked, and About to Snap Strategies for Handling Your Fast- Paced LifeOHIO only handle it once. When it comes to a document or journal or any concrete item, try your best to 1) respond to it right away, 2) put it in a labeled file, not a pile, or 3) throw it away. In the majority of instances, choice 3 is the best.More on how to be efficient with the onslaught of email here.7. Have leisure goalsIronic, right? fruchtwein of us think about leisure as doing nothing. But thats a dangerous way to view it.Research shows were happier when we accomplish things (playing tennis with a friend vs. flipping TV channels.)And given our habits, were prone to start checking email and firing up the usual 17 things we multitask on.So set a goal for leisure. When you have a fun thing to accomplish, you can singletask on relaxing.ViaOverwhelmed Work, Love, and Play When No One Has the TimeRoger Mannell, a psychologist at the University of Waterloo in Ontario, has directed perhaps the only lab studies of leisure time. His research has found that when people have a sense of choice and control over what they do with their free time, they are more likely to get into flow, that engrossing and timeless state that some call peak human experience. Part of the problem with leisure is that people arent quite sure what they really want. They dont kno w what leisure time is for them, Mannell said. And they never slow down long enough to figure it out.More on how to make your free time more awesome here.Sum upJust because the other people at the office are overscheduled and the other parents are doing 1000 things doesnt mean you need to.We all only have 1440 minutes a day. Accept you cant do it all, focus on whats important and do that well.Were all jealous of the people who arecalm and cool under pressure. Be that person.Next time someone asks how youre doing, dont talk about how busy you are. Dont get sucked into thinking busy means important.Busy doesnt make you important. Doing the important things you need to do makes you important.Join 45K+ readers.Get a free weekly update via emailhere.Related postsHow To Achieve Work-Life Balance In 5 StepsTime Management Skills Are Stupid. Heres What Works.What 10 things should you do every day to improve your life?This article originally appeared at Barking Up the Wrong Tree.